• Ariana Friedlander

Four Steps for Redirecting Negative Self-Talk


I learned the hard way that even after you experience success, you still have to deal with rejection and feelings of self-doubt. It doesn’t matter how successful you are, rejection hurts. Even very accomplished individuals experience imposter syndrome. The only difference is, the truly successful professional has routines and rituals for rebounding!

Here are four steps for redirecting your negative self-talk so you can maintain forward momentum on your efforts.

Step 1: What Triggers My Negative Self-Talk?

The first step is to understand the things that trigger your own negative self-talk. For me, the trigger is usually the compounding effect of a few things. I might realize I have no work lined up then wonder, where is my next client going to come from? That’s a pretty typical thought for someone in my line of work but then if I go onto CompareBook (I mean Facebook), that’s the nail in the coffin for my negative self-talk to go into it full force.

Step 2: What is a Common Pattern of Negative Self-Talk I Experience?

The second step is to deconstruct the pattern of your negative self-talk. My inner critic chimes in with unproductive comments like these interspersed over a short period of time that build on each other… “What do you know anyway?” “You’re never going to be good enough at this.” “Give it a rest. This is just the beginning of the end.” Early on in my business when I listened to such negative self-talk I would sink into despair. Now, I go to step three instead.

Step 3: What Rejuvenates Me When I’m Feeling Down?

The third step is to interrupt the pattern. I like to do something that rejuvenates me. I actually have a list in my journal of the things that rejuvenate me, which includes: going for a walk, yoga, talking on the phone with a friend, drinking water and…writing in my journal!

Step 4: What is a Positive Affirmation I Can Say to Myself?

The last step is to counter the negative self-talk with a positive affirmation. Within my first few years in business I came up with an affirmation and I will still say it to myself today. It goes like this: I am light, I am love, I am life. I am valued and valuable. My services are sought after and acquired.

So there you have it, four steps for redirecting negative self-talk! Explore your own triggers, patterns, rejuvenating practices and affirmations by writing reflections in your journal or sharing your thoughts here.

What’s Rosabella Consulting Up To?


Last week Ariana led a workshop on Conversational Intelligence at the Larimer County Workforce Center.

Plus we’ve been busy distributing copies of A Misfit Entrepreneur’s Guide to libraries in Northern Colorado and beyond as part of our campaign to promote entrepreneurship and literacy. Checkout the map of our current locations and borrow a copy today!

Traveling somewhere interesting this summer? Request a copy of the book to bring on your travels (or buy a copy) and leave it a Little Free Library (just take a picture & tell us where it is so we can add it to our map) – so far we have friends bringing copies to Iceland, Japan, Grand Lake, Tiffin, and…

#EntrepreNerds #Perspective #Leadership #Practice #Learning #Journaling #MisfitBook #LimitingBeliefs #Change #Creativity #Communicating #Mantras #vulnerability #OvercomingAdversity #CompanyCulture #Business #Inspire #DecisionMaking #Relationships

Get inspiration to journal!

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